Friend: “Hey, I haven’t seen you in forever! how are you?”
me: “Fine, thanks.”
Lemony Snicket from outta nowhere: “Of course, in this case, ‘fine’ is only meant to reassure. She has never been less fine, nor was she ever fine in the first place. Here, the word ‘fine’ could be defined as ‘I am actually slowly dying on the inside, but don’t wish for anyone to worry’.
Full offense but your writing style is for you and nobody else. Use the words you want to use; play with language, experiment, use said, use adverbs, use “unrealistic” writing patterns, slap words you don’t even know are words on the page. Language is a sandbox and you, as the author, are at liberty to shape it however you wish. Build castles. Build a hovel. Build a mountain on a mountain or make a tiny cottage on a hill. Whatever it is you want to do. Write.
1) “Oh, you’re so golden,” the villain purred. “All I can think is how good you’d look utterly wrecked. Dirtied up.” The hero swallowed, eyes wide.
2) “Are you going to put me in handcuffs? Tell me how bad I’ve been? Punish me to the full extent of the law?” “Stop it.” “Make me.”
3) “Look at you, all cute and righteous. I love this aesthetic you have going on.” “I’m not righteous, I’m just right!” “Of course, I’m still going to have to stop you. A pity really. The way you handled my men was exquisite, but all good things must end as they say. En garde then, hero?”
4) “You don’t have to do this, please,” the hero said. “Ah, but when would we ever spend time with each otherwise? I think I’d miss you too much.” “You can’t be serious.” “You’ll never know.”
5) “All this saving the world, you’re going to make me jealous.” “Maybe you should help me then so we can back to our regularly scheduled feuding.” “Well, only because you’re pretty.”
why come they called him “beast” in the castle when everyone knew his name cuz they’d been working for him forever anyway? like …. i would just be like “hey chewbacca-Adam” or some shit, there’s no reason to call him beast … id hide in my room all day too if my employees started making fun of me..
If my manager decided to pull some rude ass shit with a witch and got me living the next ten years of my life as an immortal singing toaster oven you can bet your ass I’d wake him up every goddamn morning with a flaming panini directly to the face. rise and shine, you ugly fuck, time hear a song
persephone's corner 