Tag: text
me: reblogs something
[a very little time later]
me: lmao did you see this post?
my sister: …you reblogged it from me
hot take: jake peralta is bi and john mulaney plays his ex boyfriend from high school in season six of brooklyn nine-nine
john mulaney plays a rockin’ twink
John Mulaney: *to himself* What would Leonard Bernstein do?
Captain Holt: *to Jake, quietly* I support your and Amy’s relationship with my whole heart but why on earth would you give up a man like that
I don’t even go here (just like… my toes) and I want this, specifically with all these tages from @bosstoaster
#The episode would be Amy getting jealous not of John and Jake but that he has so many interests in common with Holt#So she spends the whole time trying to win back the Captain#Meanwhile Rosa is on a warpath at Jake#Because she told HIM about her sexuality and stuff and had EMOTIONS#And he didn’t tell HER#How DARE he
“look, it’s not like i hid anything, it just never came up!”
“You called yourself out for ‘straighsplaining’“
the whole bi thing goes completely over charles’ head and he keeps getting really aggro like “oh you and jake were real close huh?? too bad, sucker jake is MY best friend!”
everybody else is like “charles no”
at the end john mulaney turns out to be the embezzler they’ve been looking for
They finally arrest him for killing Princess Diana
he’s making a list, he’s checking it twice!
he’s gonna find out who’s on thin fucking ice!
🎶 Santa Claus is callin’ you out 🎶
my kink is melodramatic declarations of love from 19th century novels
“The night itself wanted to touch her,”
— Peter Redgrove, from “Water-Witch, Wood-Witch, Wine-Witch,” wr. c. 1968 (via violentwavesofemotion)
“makeup actually expires!!!” not if it costs more than $5 it doesnt
It expires when its empty
dude god could come down from heaven with a million angels and tell me that gif is pronounced “jif” and i still wouldn’t fucking do it
I’d just shrug and say, “Okay, thanks, Jod, I’ll keep that in mind.”
Some guy in Ancient Greece, pointing at a perfectly climbable mountain: There are gods up there!
The rest of Ancient Greece: Sick, no need to fact check that
hermione granger and her twin sister, hermitwo
persephone's corner 