one thing I will never understand is how normal people are unaffected by movies or books I mean when they watch a movie or finish a book they say “well that was a good movie/book” and they move on while I have an existentional crisis and question the whole universe
I love the ACOTAR series, but I think I’d adore a version of it where fairies (and High Fae too) are a bit weirder and dangerous and monstrous and inhuman: still beautiful, but beautiful in a way that is not uber-movie-star perfection, but a wicked, disturbing and definitively otherwordly thing.
Like, Tamlin would still be the High Lord of spring, sure – but his hair would be actual flowers, closing and blossoming with twilight and dawn, and antlers on his head, and maybe sometimes, when he’s sleeping or fighting or fucking, thorns would spread from under his skin, bleeding with wild roses.
Rhysand would still be breath-takingly handsome – but he’d be a sleek, smoky thing of moon and dark, pianist fingers ending in talons he can’t hide, and raven’s feathers instead of hair. His eyes would stil be lovely and violet-blue, but they’d be an actual moonlit sky – with stars slowly spinning in them, and a solitary moon rising and waning where pupils should be.
Mor would still be herself, but a tad more like the Celtic Goddess she takes her name from: sweet and silvery, refreshing like clear water, with hair spun in starlight tumbling down her shoulders and snagging in her amor, the maiden and the mother. But then she’d step on the battlefield, and warriors would fall at her blade, and then her cheeks would flush crimson, her eyes bleeding red, and she’d be beautiful and horrible at the same time, beaming with silver light, a quartz princess of the dark caves of her kin.
Elain would get out of the Cauldron with fawn’s velvety ears, vines and blossoms spiraling and spreading across her skin, almost tattoos, shifting with the sun and her emotions. At first, they’d stay tightly closed – shivering and wrinkled liker her soul. And Lucien would have true fox ears, and clever, gold-flicked fox eyes, and his ears would tremble with delight the first morning he would make one of Elain’s blossoms open to him.
Nesta would forever be beautiful, but she would never be lovely again. The Cauldron didn’t leave her any softness, any warmth, any sweetness of features or shape. Looking at the sharp planes of her face, at the bloody-red slash of her lips is like looking at the jagged peaks of a mountain – at white wood washed over a shore, polished and hard and dead. She mourns her youth in secret: she mourns whatever girl-like beauty she has ever had, that scrap of Elain that used to live in her. Now she looks like a monster. She looks like something you should be scared of. But Cassian has teeth, predator’s teeth, and his hands have claws, and when he’s holding her she’s not afraid he will be scared.
Maybe they’ll devour each other, but they’ll do it together.
And Feyre… Feyre would find herself with new joints, new hands – with eyes that could see clearer and wider than ever before, but that are also pure pools of black, with no pupil no iris and no white. Her teeth are sharp – they tear through her lovers’ skin and don’t stop till they draw blood. And there’s something of the forest in her, too, of the woods where she had made herself a hunter: twigs and leaves growing amidst her hair, corsets made of leather and oakwood, so that when she’s running through the trees she looks like a sprite or a pixie – barefoot, quiver on her back, fangs bared in pleasure. She passes by with the rustling of fallen leaves, the whisper of squirrels and owls’ wings. You wouldn’t know she’s behind you till she’ll lean in to kiss your cheek, or stop your heart.
“Feyre darling,” this strange star-eyed Rhys would say, cupping the cheek of his wood-made girl, holding her close so feathers and twigs would mix together, and they would smile mirror fanged smiles, and they would still be beautiful.
contrary to social media developers’ beliefs i have literally never once wanted to see posts in anything other than chronological order
Ser Davos Seaworth: [about Stannis] HOW DARE YOU DO YOU KNOW WHO YOU’RE TALKING TO THIS IS STANNIS OF THE HOUSE BARATHEON KING OF THE ANDALS AND THE FIRST MEN LORD OF THE SEVEN KINGDOMS AND PROTECTOR OF THE REALM WASH YOUR MOUTH BEFORE SPEAKING TO HIM I WILL FIGHT YOU
Ser Davos Seaworth: [about Jon Snow] … dis jonny. he cool
Umbridge: Mr. Potter, do you expect to be attacked in my class?
Harry: Yes.
Umbridge: What?
Harry: Well, I mean, I’m running four for four.
Umbridge: Mr. Potter-
Harry: Quirrel tried to choke me out.
Umbridge: Mr. Potter-
Harry: And Lockhart tried to wipe my memory.
Umbridge: Mr. Potter-
Harry: Of course, Professor Lupin didn’t mean it. He just forgot his potion, but still, totally went werewolf on me.
Umbridge: MR. POTTER-
Harry: And then Moody turned out to be an escaped Death Eater in disguise.
Umbridge: POTTER!
Harry: So, yeah, I figure it’s 100% you’ll attack me in June, 50/50 you’ll try to kill me, with a 25% chance of an Unforgivable curse.
Harry: (Turns to Hermione)
Harry: Did I get the math right?
Hermione: Yes.
i honestly cant comprehend it when people say that they dont ship Jake and Amy when they are like such literal One True Pairing material like??
– slowburn, mutual pining
– such a soft naturally developed relationship that went from partnerts at work to partners in life and their dating just made it so much richer
– the “i know youre dating another guy and i dont want to make this awkward but i just had to let you know that i really like you but dont worry i wont bother you about it”
– literal canon fake dating au
– when they start dating they try to hide it from thieir friends work family trope but they literally fail in a day
– the universe seems to tell us this is a bad idea but you know what fuck that noise i wanna be with you
– they literally accidentally kill a man by making out at their 1st official day of being a couple like?? get you an otp who can top that
– “theres no one elses opinion that matters more to me” “he makes me laugh”
– they were friends before they started dating!! and they remained silly competitive friends even after they became a couple!!
– no “now that were dating i suddenly realized you have flaws and i dont want this anymore” drama
– they literally asked for their work dads approval
– like literally no unnecessary drama they fight a few times but none of it is ever superficial or due to bad communication?
– they literally flirt all the time and have their own silly puns and eyeroll eachother but never make the other feel uncomfortable??
– they support each other and are very attentive to the others interests? they try to become involved in things that the other likes just to make them happy??
– “i know that youre dating someone else but im here for you as a friend and i want to see you happy”