You know what I don’t get? When fanfic authors apologize for long chapters. It’s like? You gave me bonus content, for free, and you’re sorry about it? Bruh. I have already named my firstborn after you. Dude.
You know what else I don’t get? When they apologize for short updates. It’s like: look at these new words I gave you! Sorry I didn’t give you even more free words. Bro, that’s at least two words that I did not have yesterday. For free. Dude. Thank you.
And another thing: when people drop out of nowhere with a surprise update and then apologize for it taking a while. Like, dude, I wasn’t expecting anything, and you gave me words. I thought this fic was abandoned, but wait: there’s more. You just popped in and reminded me that this is a Good Fic that I should probably reread. You made my goshdarn day.
Basically fanfic writers are under no obligation to publish anything so when they do update it’s always a net positive because the story is longer now, and I have something to read, so thank you so much to everyone who writes fic at whatever pace or quantity they want.
Tag: fanfics
nothing like the sun by @talloohlips
Wherein Hermione follows the old Muggle admonition that she keep her enemies closer just a little too strictly to the letter, and unwittingly gets herself a charmingly homicidal boyfriend in the process.
Published erotica: terribly written, costs money
Fanfiction on ao3: Free, isn’t affaid TO JUST USE THE WORD ‘COCK’ FFS
“His genitals, his privates, his hot length, his trobing rod, his magic meat stick-”
Me, in tears: Just say cock
published erotica: the parts that aren’t purple prose about vanilla sex are occupied by dithering and made up problems
fanfiction on ao3: the parts that aren’t sharp, clear prose about scorching kinky sex are occupied by tightly plotted suspense and slam-bang action
published erotica: not interested in the 99% of the market that’s heterosexual? that’s fine, we also have tender white middle class lesbians and slutty white middle class gay men!
fanfiction on ao3: one trans partner? both partners trans? genderswaps? how about a loving long-term threesome that does heist capers? we’ve got non-gendered angels, hermaphroditic aliens – some of whom lay eggs, if you’re into that – oh, and have i mentioned the robots –
published erotica: there, i put in a vampire, i’m such a genre rebel
fanfiction on ao3: i sent the avengers to hogwarts with the winchester brothers, i fear nothing on earth or heaven and only one thing in hell which is that my laptop will overheat in the fires of abaddon so i’ll have to write the sequel longhand
o/
Also: Whenever I hear a guy go “Oooh, but women don’t like porn” i think of the enormous amount of porn in fandom created by women for women and all I can think is: “Well, maybe we just don’t like your porn…”
We like our porn with feelings and character development and regular updates on AO3
this is the best reaction so far.
Writer Appreciation – @colubrina‘s fanfics
Fanfiction Writer Asks
Most of the writer ask posts I come across are only like ten or so questions long so I thought I’d try to make a longer one because we like talking about our writing! Feel free to reblog!
1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction?
2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one?
3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.
4) What is your favourite genre to write for?
5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi chaptered stories, which would it be and why?
6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?
7) When is your preferred time to write?
8) Where do you take your inspiration from?
9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote?
10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind?
11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?
12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?
13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?
14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? – You can ask about multiple stories.
15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?
16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx?
17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.
18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?
19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?
20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?
21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?
22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?
23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?
24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?
25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?
26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write?
27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?
28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?
29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?
30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?
31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec not the answerer)
32) Are any of your characters based on real people?
33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?
34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?
35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?
36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?
37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?
38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.
39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?
40) Do people know you write fanfiction?
41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?
42) Song fic – What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx.
43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?
44) What is the last line you wrote?
45) What spurs you on during the writing process?
46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it?
47) Here’s a fic title – insert a made up title. What would this story be about?
48) What’s your favourite trope to write?
49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?
50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?
My bestfriend : So who’s the worst villian you’ve ever seen in a fanfiction?
Me : Miscommunication
*pulls up to the fanfic drive-thru window* uh yeah, i’ll take a fake relationship with a side of mutual pining and thinking the other isn’t interested, thanks
#*bored author’s voice over the tannoy* d’you want fluff with that? (via @amarriageoftrueminds)
#sure and if you can throw in an extra “sharing one bed” trope, that would be great.
How much is it to supersize to smut?
So if you get smut and fluff from a drive thru where do you go for angst and dark?
That you order from the guy in the trenchcoat in the alley.
“You want angst? I got angst”*sticks my withered goblin paw out from under the bed* psst kid i got ‘they both think the other one is dead for like seven chapters’
Reader: “How much will that be?”
Author: “Just a comment. Please for the love of God leave a comment.”
“Do you take fanart?”
judging by fan fictions, the only jobs in the world are being a teacher, lawyer, waiter, or working at a coffee shop
and man do the people with those jobs have a lot of sex